How much is this computer going to cost? 2023 Getty Images. Ditch the uncertainty & get the love you deserve! The cure for overwhelm + stress is here: a simple yet powerful21-minute morning system that melts stress and gives you more energy through 6 science-backedpracticesand breathwork. Ive been speaking, teaching, and coaching all over the world for 40 years. Well, for lots of reasons. Complaining is a habit you want to break. I just need to talk for a while and feel that you care.. PR.com: I cant speak for men. Women need caring, understanding, respect, and reassurance. 2023 Getty Images. John Gray is a person who has big problems in his personal life and family life. WishingWell, Inc is a non-profit 501 (C) 3 parent of HealCircle, HealthierPodcast, HealCircle, HealerPedia and HealthBootcamps brands. On the other hand a womans heart opens when she is successful in getting the love support she needs. Suddenly, our lives have become so fast that now women are seeking ways to cope with stress, and some are doing it more effectively than others. Ill just nod and not say anything to be dismissive of the whole thing. Sometimes, people dont even know what their needs are. The goal is lower estrogen and increasing testosterone. I got them opening up and sharing feelings at a deeper level than they knew they had. I feel like you get what you want and I get seconds. (Photo by Acey Harper/Getty Images). I think his historical grounding for those roles is preposterous. The Getty Images design is a trademark of Getty Images. But when a man opens up about his feelings a woman becomes even more concerned with upsetting him. We are naturally drawn to situations that help us cope with stress. HealCircles.org is a new social network to release stress, come join us! Why it's important for men to do things and be busy to help them feel more, Various exercises and things partners can do to heal and create a, Why men need to spend more time alone and do something that challenges them in a healthy manner like an ice bath or a. I ask questions like, Is it really fair that I have to put up with this kind of abuse over and over? I ask, Is this really the best she can do? I ask, Is it always going to be like this.. Boards are the best place to save images and video clips. That is all a good thing in terms of equal opportunity. But as for the John Gray thing, I see the value in the underpinnings of what hes saying, but the text is just so . In fact, last night he said, I had a rough day. On a certain level, when a guy stops having sex or when he doesnt want sex, he doesnt want it, so he doesnt miss it. it gives you 30 days of free weekly tracking of your moods, diet, meds, symptoms, notes, goals and gratitude. USA Today listed his book as one of the top 10 most influential books of the last quarter century. Crazy. Spiritual growth can only occur when you become aware of that, feel it, and know it. Bonnie is Johns wife and in his books, she needs to act in ways that allow him to model how husbands should respond when their wives seem petulant and unreasonable. How a woman can dive deep and realize what other needs she has for connection in a relationship and not just intimate needs. WebJohn Gray lives in Northern California with his wife, Bonnie. Then our most special support is our intimate relationship. Theres the guy who just likes girls and also has male friends. He talked to all his friends and everyone told him to end it. I dont know why you have to get another computer. (She persisted). PR.com: I particularly love the two page cartoon in the center of this book. Reassurance is a key factor to level their testosterone and keep that estrogen up. Dr. John Gray, The only way that you can grow is to step beyond where you were limited. I want to go unwind and watch a movie. I had him go into a room and shut the door. When you're cool, calm, and collected with pausing between responses in a conversation, that shows that you're trying to be understanding and caring to a woman. Release the past, reconnect, and rediscover play. A Feminist wrote a book called, Men Are Just Desserts. Everybody kept saying, Why? Everyone has the power to create fulfilling, passionate, dynamic relationships if they're willing to show up and do the inner work. His many books, blogs, and free online workshops at MarsVenus.com provide practical insights to improve relationships at all stages of life and love. Access the best of Getty Images with our simple subscription plan. Yours works fine. When I want something, it doesnt seem so important. Yet, if they meet someone new and different it is easy to get it back temporarily, because new and different is a lot of challenge which stimulates dopamine, which in turn stimulates testosterone. Then we have a gift to encourage you! When we are under stress is when these differences show up the most. I did it for years. dr john gray wife, bonnie 27 Feb. dr john gray wife, bonnie We are no longer limited by the traditional roles of hunter/gatherer or breadwinner/homemaker. When the kids were little I told Bonnie, Every Monday, thats your day off. Sometimes Im away for a week and when I come back its really fantastic. If my wife says, I want to go get a massage, I know men that would say, Well, honey, thats expensive. If my wife wants a massage, thats as important as a doctors appointment (laughs). Try not verbalize negative complaints to your loved ones. He has been profiled in Time, Forbes, USA Today, and People. But speaking as a woman, when I read in your book how women really need that female bonding and camaraderie, and how they spent all day bonding with other women many decades ago, I was picturing an old fashioned sewing circle. John Gray: Oh, theres no question in anybodys mind that that is the case. An advocate of health and optimal brain function, he also provides natural solutions for overcoming depression, anxiety and stress to support increased energy, libido, hormonal balance and better sleep. Its not a big deal but I just want you to know about it .. John Gray: Its blowing everybody away. Estrogen suppresses testosterone. I had achieved success in my life, but without sharing it with my family, it wasnt as fulfilling. Please contact us anytime at help@healcircle.org for any questions or to just connect and share your thoughts! He would protect them and he would help fix things when they break, and he was kind of the emergency man (a term Gray refers to in his book). Very little more was expected of him. Its spot on! PR.com: Yes, that is true. Women before menopause require 10 times more estrogen than men. Through videos, blog posts, online courses, books, and groundbreaking live events, youll learn down-to-earth practical insight and wisdom that will change your life forever. Any time a man has difficult challenge something hes good at and enjoys doing hes testosterone goes up. John Gray may be associate pastor at the largest church in America, but hes not your daddys preacher. Its not like I have all this thought out (He asked what she thought they should spend the money on). In the nineties the drug companies discovered that oxytocin was not only the nurturing hormone, but was also the hormone responsible for womens sexual response. These arerole materelationships where people play out their roles in order to create harmony. Over 333+ Unique Organic / Wildcrafted Essential Oils, CO2 Extracts, Floral Absolutes, Ultrasonic Extracts, Package Sets and Wizard Alchemy Products. Gray married self-help author Barbara De Angelis. And is it really irrational to do first the only thing you can do firstthis is from Bonnie Grays point of viewand so, clear the way to do what can, after all, be done second? Heart. When my wife would take responsibility for her happiness, and then ask me to do something [for her], then she would become happier, and I would take credit for the whole thing. I thought in terms of estrogen and Progesterone. He has been profiled in Time, Forbes, USA Today, and People. John and Bonnie Gray, Just Doin TheirJobs. If Bonnie does what she is supposed to do, it will make it much easier for John to respond to her. The key to any communication is to start with the phrase- this is not a big deal, just take it into consideration. Read More On The Sun Johns discussion of his two-year grieving process over the passing of his longtime partner Bonnie gives us some important perspective and inspiration. I dont know if you have seen this pattern in the therapy that you do, but having a child accentuates the differences between men and women, tenfold. I was the bystander I had in mind and I really would not like to see that transaction, much less to be on the receiving end of Bonnies anger. Dr. Gray lives in Northern California where for 34 years he happily shared his life with his beautiful wife, Bonnie, until her passing in 2018. A most contributing factor to heart disease in men is testosterone. Webdr john gray wife, bonnie. He has appeared repeatedly on Oprah, as well as on The Dr. Oz Show, TODAY, CBS This Morning, Good Morning America, and others. WebJohn Gray lives in Northern California with his wife of 26 years, Bonnie. They have been happily married for over 30 years and have three grown daughters and four grandchildren. His approach combines specific communication techniques with healthy, nutritional choices that create the brain and body chemistry for lasting health, happiness and romance. His Mars/Venus book series has forever changed the way men and women view their relationships. Its the hormone that lowers stress for women. Maybe I am mad that you want so much more than me. Women need caring, understanding, respect, and reassurance. The problem is that she has feelings that prevent her from having a fact-based conversation about the computer and other household needs. My wife and I have been together for thirty years, and weve been married twenty-five years. Suddenly those feelings come back. In that sense, there is symmetry to their roles. Two. Author John Gray & his wife Bonnie lying on a hammock in their backyard. John Gray: The good thing is that women are, to a great extent, seen as equals in the workplace, and in the universities there are more women graduating than men. An advocate of health and optimal brain function, he also provides natural solutions for overcoming depression, anxiety and stress to support increased energy, libido, hormonal balance and better sleep. Exploring a woman's different love needs and how their partners can fulfill them. But it feels like everything we do is for you and not me. His most recent book is Beyond Mars and Venus: new relationship skills for our complex modern world. : http://bit.ly/1wJ0ugIOur Fantastic Lineup: http://bit.ly/1qMi2jEConnect with OWN Online:Visit the OWN WEBSITE: http://bit.ly/1qMi2jELike OWN on FACEBOOK: http://on.fb.me/1AXYujpFollow OWN on TWITTER: http://bit.ly/1sJin8YFollow OWN on INSTAGRAM: http://bit.ly/LnqzMzFollow OWN on PINTEREST: http://bit.ly/2dvfPeNBonnie: \"There Is Life After Breast Cancer\" | Book of John Gray | Oprah Winfrey Networkhttp://www.youtube.com/user/OWN Some of them are preferences, some of them are simply temperaments. How do you know? My answer in those years was, Ive got a counseling practice, and Im married myself, and women almost all say the same things (laughs) about their husbands, and about themselves. There were themes that are very universal in almost every household. We can even get addicted to complaining. And I dont know them, but theyd been married forty years. John Gray: The idea first came into my consciousness many years ago. Thats a reality that has happened to all of us. We want to be the add-on. PR.com: How did you come to these conclusions, regarding hormonal differences, in the way men and women express and diffuse their stress? A side effect is that they stop being women. (This latter means, of course, that they stop being women in the way Gray thinks they ought to be.). In his newest book, Venus On Fire, Mars On Ice, author John Gray explains how our hormones, stress levels, and recent social and gender customs have collided to create the conflicts and health ills we see in present-day western relationships and marriages. John Gray lives in Northern California where for 34 years he happily shared his life with his beautiful wife, Bonnie, until her passing in 2018. No one has really done that. Their life does it. Boards are the best place to save images and video clips. My daughter Lauren and I are deeply committed to helping you attract, create, and nurture the love that is your birthright. . (Photo by Acey Harper/Getty Images) PURCHASE A LICENSE. It gets locked up and you cant access it with your partner if your testosterone levels start dropping. John Gray: My book is to help women get underneath the surface and find out the physiology of what is really making them tick, how they can support themselves the best, and how their husbands can support them the best. How Dr. John would comfort his wife when she would have, What creates passion in a relationship: our differences and being. Reassurance is a key factor to keep that estrogen up. Find out as Dr. John Gray explores the masculine and feminine sexual polarities of our modern world. She will feel like she is your mother or she will shut down. So what I did was to spend some time apologizing for being late. (He says he didnt like being questioned, but by saying as little as this, he was able to prevent clashing with her). Bonnie says, I have a lot of feelings coming up, and I would like to talk about them. John Gray Speech. If that fails, pull out the rope-a-dope, which is what he does. Heres the hard one. Your email address will not be published. Nobody has done that study yet, but Ive done it in my own anecdotal research. You write like a man who has had experience getting to the source of the problem and also a man who tried rope-a-dope. I just want you to know in advance that it sounds worse than it is. Now lets look at what Bonnie Grays responsibilities are. Its hard to identify that as a problem, but then it becomes a problem when you want to have sex with someone else. It was ugly and I am glad I dont do it anymore. Premium Organic Moringa Oleifera Leaf Powder, Organic India Tulsi Caffeine Free Tea, Sweet Rose, 18 Count, The Ketogenic and Modified Atkins Diets: Treatments for Epilepsy and Other Disorders, Pure Encapsulations - Magnesium (Citrate) 180 Capsules, Dr. Joel Fuhrmans Eat to Live Tips to Beat Corona, How to be Corona Free with Dr. Todd Ovokaitys. In hardcover, it was the #1 best-selling book of the 1990s. For your testosterone level to stay that high, you have to feel confident that you are loved. I dont know why you have to get another computer. Women come naturally to this role because while the caveman husband was off fighting enemiesthats where the ducking and dodging came from, rememberthe cavewoman is home preparing. John Gray is the founder of the now vast Mars/Venus industries: books, seminars, websites, and so on. Learning to deal with our emotions and stress is the key to heart health. I ask questions like, Is it really fair that I have to put up with this kind of abuse over and over?, I ask, Is this really the best she can do?, I ask, Is it always going to be like this.. WebDr. Key insight is dont verbalize the negative but you can share the emotions. Ive dated dramatic and overly emotional women and its just not for me. He has been profiled in Time, Forbes, USA Today, and People. I will just present Bonnies four responses because she is the one who gets my sympathy today. When I want something, it doesnt seem so important. Based on what Ive heard before and read here, it feels like it was written completely for women, which kind of defeats the purpose. Yes, we clearly got a couple of good ones, and I know you were being self-congratulatory in a jokey way, but we are with Kathie and Bette out of choice, not providence. His approach combines specific communication techniques with healthy, nutritional choices that create the brain and body chemistry for lasting health, happiness and romance. In hardcover, it was the #1 best selling book of the 1990s. WebThe best change I made was marrying my wife, Bonnie, and having a family. We dont have to change our partners much. I chose someone who can talk about her feelings and rarely acts out without knowing or conveying why. Im going to a mens group meeting tonight. And so is Bette, although if I did let it slip and act like that, she would say, Thats not like you at all.. There are good things and not such good things that have happened from the feminist movement. 046 Dr. John Gray: ADHD, Brain Health, & Sex Addiction, Solocast | A Victim of Intellectualization & The Wisdom of The Heart, Solocast | The Sedation of Society: How To Reconnect & Strengthen Your Souls Connection, How to Get Everything You Want in Relationships, Paleovalley Save 15% on your ACV Complex with the code JOSH', Seeking Health Save 10% with the code JOSH', Organifi Special 20% off to our listeners with the code WELLNESSFORCE', Drink LMNT Zero Sugar Hydration: Get your free LMNT Sample Pack, you only cover the cost of shipping, Botanic Tonics Save 40% when you use the code WELLNESS40, Essential Oil Wizardry: Save 10% with the code WELLNESSFORCE', Cured Nutrition Get 15% off of your order when you visit wellnessforce.com/cured + use the code WELLNESSFORCE'. When something seems amiss, and someone is acting irrationally, you should immediately try to get to the source of the problem, rather than reacting to the symptoms. They are busy working all the time and not together, and I am sure one of them just got turned on for the first time in twenty years (laughs). They have three grown daughters and Here they are in much earlier days, before all the ducking and dodging and pausing and preparing. My approach combines specific communication techniques with healthy, nutritional choices that create the brain and body chemistry for lasting health, happiness, and romance. Then Gray married his second wife, Bonnie, in 1986 and she died of cancer in 2018. He was also the subject of a three hour special hosted by Barbara Walters. There are so many things we need to spend money on in the house and you are buying a computer. Sometimes I can dig down and find it, sometimes I cant. The #1 essential oil endorsed by Wellness Force! It just feels like you dont care about me. And one will tend to be repelled from the women that are becoming like men. But the flip side is that in the process many women experience divorce or never got married, and they wonder, Why am I not attractive to men? and Why am I never satisfied with the men that Im in relationships with? So there is a lot of confusion that came about. They have three grown daughters and four grandchildren. John Gray: Its a common pattern. WebHe is a recipient of the coveted the Smart Marriages Impact Award. His point in this book is that we dont know what we need to know because our parents didnt tell us and they didnt tell us because we are living a life that would have mystified them entirely. PR.com: Ive heard a lot of these stories from women I know; young women in their twenties and early thirties. One of the key components for lowering stress for women is nurturing activities, rhythmic activities and non-urgency activities. It has tried to feminize men. John Gray: Yes, he did (laughs). They need to forget about their problems to get their testosterone up. So they did the best they could, and they became like men in order to get that respect. It was all of these oxytocin stimulating activities like massage and spas. That is the formula for healthy relationships. WebAuthor John Gray & his wife Bonnie lying on a hammock in their backyard. My friend is engaged to this woman and theyre having some difficulties. By entering your email address you are also requesting and agreeing to subscribe to our email list. (He says he didnt like being questioned, but by saying as little as this, he was able to prevent clashing with her). Learn to minimize and speak emotions. I was the bystander I had in mind and I really would not like to see that transaction, much less to be on the receiving end of Bonnies anger. Care about me can share the emotions locked up and sharing feelings at a level. 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